Death Humor 4
​​When chemists die, they barium.
Dead kings get throne away.
Magicians simply disappear.
Dog catchers go astray.
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When chauffeurs pass, they lose their drive.
Dead ranchers get deranged.
Composers simply decompose, while bankers are unchanged.
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It’s said that swimmers have a stroke.
Mechanics are retired.
The end for human cannonballs is often when they’re fired.
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Librarians, they just check out.
Shoemakers get the boot.
Old cows just kick the bucket, and dead owls don’t give a hoot.
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When travel agents go they take a permanent vacation,
and dead cartoonists end up in suspended animation.
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How is it that I always seem to buy the plants without the will to live?
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I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.
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My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him.
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I saw an ad for burial plots and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.
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The Man Who Created Autocorrect Has Died. Resturant In Piece.
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Think about it my friends.
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Every single corpse on Mt Everest was once a highly motivated person.
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Stay lazy my friends.